Tuesday 11 March 2014

Sting lays into the Poppies

News that the trees surrounding the pitch at Latimer Park have started to be felled has not met with universal praise.  The local population are not happy that they might accidentally observe the Poppies in action.  They are even less impressed by the possibility of footballs flying through their windows.  Needless to say, the pigeon population isn't entirely joyful at the loss of valuable roosting area.

But the loudest complaint thus far has come from Mr Gordon Sumner.  Mr Sumner, a tedious old rocker and eco-warrior, better known by his stage name Sting, has taken to Twittersphere to lead the fight against today's tree felling in Burton Latimer. 

"This is truly shocking!  How am I supposed to bully strange, smelly foreigners into not destroying their forests when I turn around and we're chopping down firs in my own country?"

"FFS!  How are Bono and me supposed to save the planet when Kettering Town Football Club have taken it upon themselves to piss all over our great work?  All this after I almost chipped in a few quid to your Just Giving Appeal."

"I'm not happy!  And I'm Sting!  People take notice of me!"

"Oh, and I've got a new album of Gregorian chants set within an early 20th Century industrial sound scape, out on Monday.  Reserve your copy now."


Sting, during a previous visit to Northants when
he spent some time with
the indigenous inhabitants of Rushden

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